I found out yesterday from a lady in work, who I think is either 39 or 40, that she can not adopt because she is deemed too old... how crazy is that? At first I didnt want to believe her, but I think she has looked into this. That makes me feel upset, there are so many children without families out there.. why would they stop couples from adopting at that age?? isnt the average age around 80 now?? thats a good 40 years that a child can feel loved and wanted :( breaks my heart really..
Then she went on to talk about how being a mother after 32 you are classed as a mature mother.. do you take that as good or bad?? I didnt know what to say.. I wonder if I will be a mature mother?! Allahu alim
thats my thoughts for now.. Im having a broody day today, hubby has been working and Ive been stuck withonly my own company for the whole day. I dont know how I lived on my own for so long.. honestly!!
Wow I'm a mature mother then..hmm never heard that before. They really should let them adopt at that age...I mean women are having babies at age 40 too...so why not?
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't know where you are, but here in DK you're not classified as a mature mother unless you're over the age of 35 (at the time of birth), the average age for the first baby is 28. You can continue to adopt until the age of 45, after that it takes a special approval and/or depends on the age of the child at the time of the adoption.
ReplyDeleteMost women that adopt here in DK are in their late thirties though, so if she can't adopt that just seems strange to me. And like you said, she definitely has many more good years to give the child! It would be different if she was in her late 50's, in my opinion.
First time visiting your blog!! I agree with Aalya... Women still give birth at age 40... and the term "mature mother".. I find that very degrading.. and very distressing at the same time!! BTW, I loved your "recitation progress chart"!! I'm more or less in the same boat!! LOL :D
ReplyDeleteWell, at school, when studying the life cycle of females from birth to death, at the age of 30, egg quality starts to decline drastically, making it harder to get pregnant (might take a couple months/cycles rather than the first month of trying) and once you hit 35, the child is at risk of things like down syndrome, heart issues and other health problems. Once your between the age of 30 and 35 in Canada, depending on health and weight, your pregnancy is automatically termed high risk.... So i guess there is a reason for that. Yes, people have kids in their 40's and some have NO issues, whiles others have babies with health problems, hard pregnancies, etc.. It can really go either way. What Allah decrees is what will happen in the end. But the longer your body is on birth control, the more long term effects it will have on your reproductive orgrans, and the harder it will be to become pregnant.
ReplyDeletesalam,
ReplyDeleteit's a medical thing, not meant to be degrading in any way. i've heard it. depressing at the time i read it, when i realized i would fall into that category.
i am surprised someone couldn't adopt at age 40. i mean, so many people have kids at that age! and to be realistic, there are so many more needy kids than there are willing caregivers. so sad.
me too never heard of mature mother, that makes me one too, I know many poeple who marry late 30's and dont have kids till around 38,39 and 40 . i agree its not right!
ReplyDelete