Eid outfit options

My mayoon outfit from Pakistan celebrations. Ok, so I have already worn it but I love that this was the first celebration outfit that I wore to fit in with my in-laws culture and traditions. The down side is the scarf I would wear would probably cover up the majority of the hand stitched design and also the pants are very thin. I don't know if they are see through thin but I think too thin for British weather, even if we are in august.



Opinions anybody??

- I'm using my iPhone as I go :)

So we are here :) Alhamdulillah.. flew in yesterday and Im just finishing off my first full day in Pakistan. I love waking up to the Adhan. I love being surrounded by adoring family (even if I cant understand 90% of what is being said) I love meeting his family and hearing the praise they give him. I love every minute of it alhamdulillah

We have all our outfits, so they just have to be made/ adjusted / picked up/ final touches added, need to get a few accessories and all done :)

My Pakistan Journal 2010

Incase you wanted to visualise as I am away writing :) here is what I will be writing in for the next month insha'Allah

Body Shop

I went to the Body Shop on Monday and decided to try a little makeover, I told the lady I didnt know what colour outfit I was wearing so I needed something subtle that would go with many different colours.. here is what I ended up buying

 

(in brown)

and some little knick knacks for the lady in laws :D was a fun morning and I was very pleased with the results

Desi parties and weddings

A few little updates about my parties... sweet sister in law, 21 Im going to have to think of nicknames for them all when I come back insha'Allah, anyways she has taken it upon herself to organise our mehndi and walimah parties and she is getting very excited. Hubby had to tell her to calm down yesterday, bless she was getting a little worried that there wouldnt be enough time to do everything (baring in mind we have a week before we leave and 1.5 weeks after we get there is the party lol) as some political murders have many shops closed :( She was more fussed about that, I was like 'erm.. hello... murders? who? why? will we be ok??' Apparently its not something I should be worried about, but I definately will not be telling my mum about it all ;)

So anyways, her plans involved something along the lines of having me carried into the mehndi party on one of those big cushion things until hubby asked her 'who will carry Ammena?' traditionally it would be the brides male relatives, but I wont have any over there! 'we will sort it out' she said... Im not too sure about that. As for the entrance to the walimah a horse drawn carriage non the less.. even though people wont see us when they are all inside, and she wants to do it just ten minutes or so before the food is served. 'So then they see us for ten minutes, eat and leave?' apparently this is what they do there.. she said ok, maybe sooner than ten minutes then.. I think we will need to sit down with her when we get there and explain the budget ;) she was excited though bless her and how can you take that away from your sister in law?? she says she wants to show me a traditional asian wedding ;)

As for the big show stopper I told you they had bought my mehndi outfit, well that isnt really the case and I think this is where her panicing is for. So I will be wearing... wait for it... my mother in laws wedding lengha skirt (red) and they are having a shirt and duputta made to match the designs on the skirt. How amazing is that?? I nearly cried, I definately filled up!!! to be given the opportunity it feels like she is wishing our marriage be as strong and successful as theirs and also feels like such a big acceptance from her too. I dont know if she thought about this when they decided to do it or what.. maybe Im thinking to much into it, but it MUST be a big deal for her too. Get this... they were worried I wouldnt like the idea because it wasnt brand new.. masha'Allah. Im so looking forward to seeing it and I told hubby I would like to pass this on to our daughter too insha'Allah... they can design their own top to fit with the fashion at the time.. but in Pakistan the lengha skirt it always going to be traditional. Allahu alim :D

Thats all the updates at the moment.. we fly the beginning of next week, yeh you read right!! less than a week to go insha'Allah. We are all packed and just finding out last minute things but if there is anymore news Ill let you all know :)
Peace and salams
Ammena

The phone call

Last night we got a phone call from Abu, the reception was bad so hubby hung up and then he phoned again... the phone was instantly passed to my sister in law, hubbys younger sister, she wanted to tell him that they had been out shopping for my mehndi outfit that day :) red and orange skirt and long sleeved top :) Im so looking forward to seeing it. She told him how she was counting down the days until we came over, shes staying with us for the whole month we are there :) mainly by ami's request to be the translator of the household when the men arent there for whatever reason. I dont care why, it will just be so exciting to have this younger married lady and her son there to play with and chat to. Plenty of photo opportunities there ;) I do worry though that I wont get time to spend with ami just the two of us, I know we dont speak the same language but when has that ever stopped 2 people commuicating?? 

Then he spoke to his other sister, the baby of the family :) she told him how she had her walimah suit :) pinkish in colour and that she only needed to get her shoes and chooriyan (bangles) hubby told her we would take her for them. She has exams at the end of March which will be finished in time for the party preparations.. alhamdulillah, ami originally told us they finish after the walimah but its all working out well alhamdulillah.

Just wanted to share this little part with you all :) Can you tell Im getting excited? I was nearly jumping on hubby last night while he was on the phone. The first sil told him she had seen some really good wedding outfits for me too and at decent prices so insha'Allah the day after we arrive we can set out to try and get most outfit things sorted and done :D will take a whole load off us then insha'Allah

Anyways, thats me for now.. got few things to shop for.

Peace and salams, Ammena

Continuation...

  ... so after the questions we were told to come back at 4pm for the visa and to go pay at a different booth. We paid in cash only, I find it very strange that they dont take cards there, and then left to wander around for a few hours until it was time to come back to pick up the visa in my passport.

We took the tube to hyde park, which was only a few minutes walk away we were told after swiping our oyster card, and wandered over to Kensington mosque to pray Dhuhr. Then we walked over to hyde park to play with the camera and relax on the grass, we had tons of fun that day alhamdulillah. We played for awhile and then it was time for asr.. we stayed in that area as there was a mosque close by.. ok so it was a mosque that hubby didnt have the best experiences with but it was a mosque and he was able to pray in congregation alhamdulillah.. that was the important part. After Asr we leisurely strolled back to the Embassy to pick up my visa, sitting inside the marqee waiting for the official people was quite interesting.. I was obviously the only non pakistani there until a pale girl walked in (and by pale I mean she was caucasian in a nice way) who actually came to pick up a pakistani passport much to our amusement and nosiness ;) So we eventually got it, yes its in my passport.. still questionning why they need 2 photos with the application yes the actual visa has no image ;)
After that we wandered back to the park for more photos before maghrib, it was so nice to get out and about just the two of us out of the usual four walls, we do miss that.. we used to spend all our time outside before we got married. We prayed maghrib and was about to make our way through the park to walk up to Edgware Road, then out of the blue I got an unusual photo call asking for someone who was obviously not me. When I told the caller they had the wrong number the lady on the other end told me she hadnt and asked for my name. When she called back I asked my husband to answer it, after which he began a long conversation with this person and when he got he he quickly told me we had left our marriage certificate at the embassy. He ran back there while I quickly walked ;) before the building closed at 6pm.. alhamdulillah we got it back much to my embarassement *blush*
Then we made our way back through the park to walk up to the arab quarter of London on Edgware road for cake :) There is a particular shop that we used to frequent alot in our pre wedding days, which sells good cheap halal meaty food for hubby, yummy spinach fatayer for me and delish chocolate for us both with good mint tea ;) yummy!! mouth watering just thinking of it all. We sat for awhile, had chocolate cake and mint tea, took a few photos, chatted about the day still not believing that they didnt give us the marriage certificate back and how much of a hassle it would have been if we didnt get it back that day. After announcing that we were both nicely full we decided to head home :)

What an adventurous and much needed day out in the capital masha'Allah
Ammena

Pakistani Embassy

On Tuesday we took a trip into central London... for a day out, a chance to play with the new camera, go to a cake shop we used to always go to when we spent more time in London, but generally with the main reason of getting my visa for Pakistan. I was looking forward to spending the day away from the house in the sunshine with the husband :) so everything else was really an added bonus
We got to the tube station around 0930 and got the tube straight to the embassy to get that done first, it was easy enough to get there and easy enough to find with the big Pakistan flag flying high in the breeze. We were pointed in the direction of an outside marqee to fill the paper work, now that was an experience!! Standing in the dirty marqee with a littered 'carpet' surrounded by intolerable children, sympathetic gazes, 'knowing' looks (I say 'knowing' because I really dont know what they thought they knew) and a language I can not understand. After being made to wait in a smaller queue we were told I couldnt get the card we were initially told to apply for :( so then we waited in the much longer queue, hubby had to go to the desk for a form as we didnt bring any because I didnt know what visa I was applying for. We got the form and I filled it in while he waited in line, got to the front of the queue and the 'helpful' (note the sarcasm) man told us about the photocopies needed and sent us away... we didnt have any cash, so I had to run to the cash machine while hubby waited in the line and paid 30p each pfff.. I told him to walk straight to the front of the queue to give it in, there was no point in waiting. After a few huffs and stares he gave it in, only for it to be given back and told to go into the main building to give in the application form and pay for the visa :) We walked into the building, a security guard told us something in urdu my husband laughed and told him in English that I didnt speak the language, he carried on and let us in. Apparently he had said 'its ok, carry on' in Urdu lol.. he was just asking us to open our bags, which I didnt cause I didnt know what he was asking... good security eh? as I pointed out to hubby later on, noone wants to blow up the Pakistani consulate in the UK lol
We sat in the open room waiting for our number to show on the tiny digital screen while a certain child ran around saying 'hi buddy' to everyone which was cute at first, until he punched my leg and stood on the ledge behind us and started lightly spitting our way. Needless to say hubby asked the mother, who was sat in the corner playing on her mobile, to keep her child to herself. That amused me ;) Finally we were called forward, gave in the documentation.. there were a few english questions but then she stopped talking to me and spoke urdu with the husband.. it wasnt until I heard 7 years masha'Allah that I knew she was asking about me being a convert.. a few questions followed 'how did you learn about the religion?' 'was it through your husband?' apparently she asked him, was it because I fell in love with him... I went on to tell her I converted before he was even thinking of coming to the uk.. that made her smile but it just gets to me sometimes... I feel very vulnerable when people ask of my conversion, Im opening up alot to tell them and they always want more details :( Allahu alim Im sure they dont mean it to affect me in that way.

Anyways, home time... will finish this up soon insha'Allah

Life

whats been going on with me? not much really :) we arent even busy preparing for the walimah in Pakistan at the moment. The deposit has been sent over for the venue which is all sorted.. I find it very odd that they cant give us a price for the food until closer the time as the prices might have changed by then. Allahu alim. I believe the invitations are all being sorted as we speak, hubby's cousin is getting married around nowish and mil and fil are travelling up to Lahore to attend the wedding so Im sure they will be giving out the majority of them at that time which is exciting :) Im sooo looking forward to seeing the outfit I will be wearing, it wont be fancy fancy insha'Allah but its all new and exciting to me ;) so leave me be lol :)
On a side related note we just bought a new camera that we have been looking at since we got married ;) its been a long time coming so alhamdulillah we have been able to do this in time for the party which was the original intention masha'Allah. Hubby has taken it over as usual taking the manual to work with him and overloading on youtube tutorials when at home but alhamdulillah hes happy. We are venturing outside tomorrow for a trip to get my Pakistan visa sorted in Central London, with plans to visit a few haunts too so Im really looking forward to getting the camera out and about :) pictures to follow insha'Allah.
Aside from camera shopping and talks of Pakistan thats all that has really been going on in my life, Im trying to organise some books to take over with me and Im very much looking forward to spending time with umi and abu and just sitting on the roof and soaking up some rays. Im going to make use of the hijab less time I have before my brother in law gets over there, its only a day or so but still ;) and hes only over for 2 weeks, which gives plenty of time afterwards too :) woohoo. The only plan we have over there apart from the party of course is to take some time in at the beach (I miss swimming and having the water on my skin that isnt the jet from the shower) hubby said we will go on our own but he also wants to go with all the family insha'Allah so plenty of photo opportunities there :)

Research

I was scolded the other day by a fellow blogger (who currently has her blog closed) while she is over here visiting her husband for a few weeks. Why? because I havent researched the things that happen and are expected of me for the Pakistani wedding. Well, I say wedding but I really just mean the party seeing as the nikah has already been done.

So what is expected of me? what will be happening? Once again we are trying to organise a big thing while not being in the country let alone the area which is slightly disheartening. I want to be part of going around and checking the venues, trying on the suits, looking through catalogues of table ware and stage setups.. this is all so new and different to me I think thats the reason why though. 

As far as I gather from translations from hubby, we may have found the hall to hold the party which is one thing. Im having a henna party on the Friday night, with the tent outside and me in the house.. his mum is collecting information about the food and decoration for the hall. You see I know all the factual things, its just really what is expected of me and what Im supposed to do for all this time. Im looking forward to meeting Aisha over there for the henna party so at least I will be able to talk comfortably with one person. I think we would have been over there for just over a week before the actual start of things, so gives me time to adjust.. to people, temperature, food, language. 

We have fabric here that was bought from Saudi by a friend of hubbies which Im thinking to get made for a suit for the henna party as its so pretty.. but then (as was pointed out to me) ami might already have a suit in mind for that party, so I have to stop thinking of what I want ;) I originally said to my husband that as long as they are fine with me covering then they can do whatever they want that we are both comfortable with. Alhamdulillah they have been fine with everything so far :) I worry that they will think Im being all 'I am' but insha'Allah it will be ok and they can see the great man their son has grown into since they last saw him so long ago. 

I will be wearing the traditional red lenga for the walimah which Im very much looking forward to :D Im currently looking for a tikka and a red nose ring which I have seen here in a shop so Im thinking to buy it before we go over :) we cant really afford much of the 'bridal jewellery' that is so traditional and his mum keeps asking, what will she wear around her neck lol.. bless her, masha'Allah
Here are a few pictures to keep you on your toes until we come back end of April ;)

Red Tika

Finishing touches, although hubby doesnt understand the need for henna seeing as I will be covered up ;)

Bridal feet

Blood red lehenga (minus the bare midriff obviously) Im still unsure as to whether I will need long sleeves if the duputta is this big, feedback??

I cant find any pictures of the nose stud.. imagine this, a thin line of gold from the hole to the end of the nostril with 3 small red stones :) its beautiful :D and Ill post pictures when I get it insha'Allah

Peace and salams

Ammena

The New Year

what will it bring? Only Allah (subhana wa ta'ala) knows but we can still look forward to it. I have to say after many years or troubles and tests Im finally seeing the benefit of it all alhamdulillah. I thank Allah (subhana wa ta'ala) every day for giving me my life and for making me into the person that I am today, trust me.. things could have been alot worse :)

Last year (well still this year really) saw many changes and these changes were all welcomed, memories have been formed and bonds solidified alhamdulillah. What did we do? well, I suppose the biggest thing really is that we got married (civil ceremony) so now we are more officially married which in turn helped to keep hubby in the country with me :) yay me :) this may not seem a big thing, but it took many months to finalise, and that wasnt just to plan... that was mainly to get my mum to actually be on board with coming over for the wedding full stop.

I got a new job, which in turn lead to us buying a car which I love having now :) Now Im on proper shifts, which means I work every other week with all weekends off yay :) which was a welcome need lol

We booked our tickets to fly to Pakistan on Xmas day :) so we are very looking forward to that insha'Allah it will be tons of fun. Hubby is getting very excited now I think, every time he talks with his parents there is something to look into. We just recently bought all the presents to take over with us for the immediate family so no more present buying insha'Allah.

As for the future, we look forward to 2 holidays next year insha'Allah.. Pakistan then over to Canada in the winter for 2 or 3 weeks, depending on my work :) and who knows what else 2011 will bring. Im just looking forward to another year with my husband insha'Allah

Peace and salams
Ammena

Our walimah

no, we havent done it
no, tickets arent booked

BUT Im very much looking forward to it all :)
The current plan is to leave the end of March and stay for the whole of April, much to my in-laws surprise, yes I will cope with the weather... anytime we go it will be hot, we have decided on the earliest month that is best for us so insha'Allah it will work out.
Im looking forward to meeting the rest of my husbands family, to see the little things people do that he tells me, to see the places he talks about and to experience things from his perspective (although obviously unfortunately not totally)
Im looking forward to not having to really think about a party ;) 2 planned weddings are definitely enough for me. So this one, I get to sit back and enjoy... especially seeing as most of the little things are nothing I know about but very important to A's family. I get to have another henna party, but this time its going to be completely filling my hands up to mid arms, and my feet.. and then Im just going to sit there and relax ;) hehee.. Im looking forward to clothes shopping for the party too, looking forward to buying things to bring back to the UK to remind me on my other family when we are home insha'Allah.. Im just really looking forward to it all... meeting new people and making new friends insha'Allah.

I cant wait to get our tickets eventually booked insha'Allah

Chats with mum

So I spoke with my mum last night, quite surprisingly it was over an hour and we had a good catch up alhamdulillah. I told her about hubby getting his visa, she congratulated and genuinely sounded pleased for us, she asked what difference this made to us and was pleased it would help in the future. She also put her two pennies worth in about what we HAVE to do now with our lives but thats just my mum. I mentioned that we were looking at flights now for Pakistan, I was not looking forward to mentioning this to her, she acknowledged but didnt go into detail with her questions. She doesnt want me to go, end of! I know that, but this isnt something she can dictate about.. this is my husbands family, hey.. this is my new family and I wont let her come between us. I mentioned to her that we are looking at coming over for about 3 weeks the end of next year so that give her something to talk about too, she asked what we would be doing and mentioned all these places that we 'had' to go bless her. I told her we would take a few days trip to Toronto, Niagara and of course the ski slopes that I used to frequent :) hubby wants to try snowboarding and Im all up for having someone to go with lol. She was very excited about this prospect but also upset that it means I wouldnt have seen her for 15 months (hubby pointed out to me later on that he hasnt seen his parents in about 28 months by the time we are looking at going over there) I told her I wasnt coming over to renew my health card in May because it was a waste of money and my time away from hubby if I went there. It was a nice conversation, minus her telling me things that I need to do but Allahu alim

On another note, Im getting very excited about the prospect of my walimah in Karachi :D Ive been asking hubby how things work over there, what I will wear for the henna party (oh yes Im having one!!) hopefully my cousin is looking at coming over for it too which would be amazing to have her there insha'Allah. Im looking forward to the clothes, the food but most of all the people. I asked A if his mum will cry when she meets us at the airport, he said probably.. I wonder if he will.

Well I started 12 hour shifts today, Ive got about 2 hours left and its not so bad. To be honest it isnt the 12 hours that kills me (I did my last working year in Canada on 12 hour shifts) its the 0230 start that does it. However, I work until Wednesday and then Im not working until the following Thursday, hubby is starting full time hours at the weekend (Saturday-Wednesday) which means that I will have 2 full days with him this thursday and friday which Im very much looking forward to. So far the only thing planned is a trip to Asda during the day when its quiet ;) so we are just going to relax together and go for salat ul-jummah insha'Allah.

Ok, let me try and look like Im actually working now
Peace and salams
Ammena xxx

Eid post

Sorry, I just realised I posted an Eid update on my private blog with photos and didnt write anything here.. so here goes
"yay.. Eid al-adha started, and its the first Eid me and hubby have actually spent the whole day together. Eid al-adha 2009 my mum was over and I was in Oxford helping her sort through my recently departed uncles possessions (this was when she first met hubby) Eid al-fitr 2010 I had just started my new job and couldnt take the day off :( 
so this was our first official Eid together and we had a brilliant day masha'Allah. We woke up early, got ready and headed off to the masjid together, prayed Eid salah and then walked back.. I really have to learn more about sunnahs to do at Eid, well both of us do really.. it took me awhile to convince hubby that we should walk a difference way home, even though it meant a direction where we would see noone. Anyways, we did ;) got home, took more photos and had tea and sheermal then decided to go out for breakfast and pick up a few groceries while we were out. We drove to the area we wanted to go to in search of Halwa Poori for the husband... alas we came away with none and decided to come back later on for dosa and dessert :D so we left the area and headed home for a little bit. Hubby spoke to family in Pakistan who arent celebrating until today :( which kind of sucks really, but then we decided to go out to eat sooner rather than later as we were walking there and back. So off we went.. and here are some photos for you

Dosa menu, well the menu but we went for dosa

tin 'glasses' I didnt dare ;)

he managed to get some meat bless him

My spicy potato masala dosa, was yummy!!

strange garlic bread

yup, thats how yummy!!!

 

just a few ice cream choices

dont even ask about cake choices, I zoomed in to take the picture but couldnt face the choices if I went any closer

News

We got the most amazing news yesterday.. after paying extra and not getting what we paid for and having to wait over a week we finally received hubbys spouse visa by recorded delivery alhamdulillah. We are so pleased to be over this for now and thank everyone who remembered us in their prayers masha'Allah. JazakAllah khair.

So now we are looking at flights to Pakistan and figuring out how much we need to save in order to have this next wedding for his family over there. I will get to meet my parent in laws which is both scary and exciting, but honestly.. I cant wait insha'Allah. We are looking at the end of February, so anyone who is in Karachi around that time, do feel free to drop by.. just tell me so I know to look out for you insha'Allah.

Again, many thanks
Peace and salams
Ammena

Languages

This really goes out to all those mothers of multi-lingual families.

Hubby and me usually get talking about what we want with our children, our thoughts, dreams and colours :D Something he said to me awhile ago is making me look for solutions and opinions out there in blogworld. Ok, so here goes.. we were discussing languages for our children, obviously my mother tongue is English and A's is Urdu... We both would like our children to speak Arabic too insha'Allah but thats not the issue here. I asked him what language would he talk to our children, 'English obviously they wont speak Urdu'
I was shocked.. why wouldnt they speak Urdu? I wanted them to, they needed to communicate with his family (mainly umi) I think he was just as surprised to find that of course I wanted him to speak to our kids in Urdu.. but how do we get around this?? what if I dont understand what my kid is asking for?? ;) Im hoping to give them 2 languages as a mother tongue insha'Allah.. I know it general takes longer for a child to talk in this sense.. has anyone else had experiences with this? One language from each parent, preferably Urdu but Im keen to hear how it went with other languages too insha'Allah

JazakAllah khair