Since August

So Ive had a few issues in my life since August. First my mum was taken into hospital with apparent kidney stones that actually turned out to be a burst appendix, sorry exploded appendix (they found it in 2 pieces) Then when she was still in hospital on her 50th birthday my grandmother died in the evening, although I didnt find out until the day after because of the time difference, yes shes in UK. So I had such a lot to deal with over those few weeks, I flew to UK for the funeral while my mum was discharged from the hospital and just relaxing at her home. Whoever reads this might find it cheesy but I really dont know how I would have gotten through those few weeks if I was without religion as I was before I found Islam and for that I am thankful. I was close to my grandparents, I never used to be when I was at my dads and we would visit them we would always complain about how boring it was there. However once I started driving when I was 17 I used to visit them more than I visited my Dad, they have both helped me a lot in my days since then and for that I am grateful. They came to visit me in May with my auntie and her family and Im so glad for that time that we spent together. When I went back for the funeral it was so strange, I saw my dad in an angle that I have never seen before. He listened to me, he watched me, he asked about me, he hugged me when he never had to and this is what upset me that I have never been given these pleasures as I was growing up. As thankful for them as I am now, I know that this is the 'silver lining' that is around every test that we face in this life and I am grateful I got to experience them before it was too late. I got to spend time with one of my half brothers who has grown up so much since I last saw him, Im so proud of what he has become and I pray that he carries on making me happy :) I miss my nana, its hard to talk to my grandad now because there isnt always someone else there to talk to. Im so used to her picking up the phone and asking if I wanted to speak to 'him' I can still hear her laugh and feel her touch, her kiss on my cheek when I left her in the airport not realising that that was the last time I would see her. I was given the chance to see her before the funeral, but I refused which I was grateful for my dad understanding and not pestering like the rest of the family seemed to do with their kids. I remember my nana, not cold or blue, but smiling and full of life even though her life was at a much slower pace than ours (I mean in terms of her walking) Im just grateful I got to know her and for that I thank God everyday, I just sometimes wish that my children could have said the same I know they would have loved her as much as I do.

Ok, thats enough of me for tonight... Im off to bed now well after I pray with the hope and intention of waking early to eat before I fast tomorrow. Take care, and thanks for reading... whoever is out there.