So I just told my dad Im getting married.. I dont know why its taken me this long, I think I was still reeling from my mums reaction and this morning I started worrying that he would have a similar reaction... so I bit the bullet and phoned him this evening to stop the unnecessary worrying. Alhamdulillah, he was genuinely pleased I could hear it in his voice, he asked when it would be, how A proposed, pointed out that I was getting close to the end of my child bearing days so a quick engagement was the right choice lol :) we laughed about it, he said he was excited and pleased for me :) passed on his congrats to A and didnt once make me think that he wasnt thinking what he was saying... Alhamdulillah
Just wanted to share that with you all. So then I texted a picture of my 'engagement' ring to my closest auntie, 2 siblings and a cousin :D they all know A and all sent their congrats, I do now officially feel better masha'Allah. I love my family.. even my mum ;)
Salaam sis and mabrook! Insha'allah your mom will come around; I am happy for you that the rest of your family is supportive. :-)
ReplyDeleteMa salaama...
Yay! Masha'Allah. So happy you've found the 'ease' with your hardship. Alhumdulillah.
ReplyDeleteWoooohoo!
ReplyDeleteI guess you're getting married ;)
P.S: I never realized that you guys never got married officially.
Salaamz sis,
ReplyDeleteAlhamdulillah it's great your dad and the rest of your family are happy for you.
However, the moment your nikah took place you were "officially" married. This is just a formality to get your marriage registered here legally aint it really. So repeating it has no meaning in essence.
See at the end of the day I understand where your mum is coming from. She's protective, that's her job and the nature of any mum. Ya she might come round inshaAllah but then again she may not. I think what you need to understand is that your husband is the one that is important here and pleasing Allah is important....approval from a family is an added bonus. At the end of the day your mum's understanding of marriage is different to that of a Muslim. Your mum's experience is invaluable as I know my mum's is - but the fact of the matter is, whilst you should respect her, she's not always going to be right. It's important to deal with her with wisdom and love and not to get disheartened or angry. She has her reasons. Prove to her in the best way you can that he is good for you and that you are happy, then what else can she want but that.
Well inshaAllah everything will pan out well and this is all just a hurdle. I usually say what I think and I think you'll understand that in the grand scheme of things, this is a small hurdle that came and went...she'll come, it'll all calm down and you'll wonder what you were fretting about...
Much love.xx
PS: Child bearing days...ah that comment made me laugh...my friend keeps telling me the same!
That's really good news sister and Umm Saahliha has said all what i could not right. You wont be able to please every one, you must aim to please Allah even if that hurts the ones you love. Ammena a mummy can't wait inshaAllah. Happy you got some good news :)
ReplyDeleteAssalamu alaikom,
ReplyDeleteGlad dad took it well... your mom will come around eventually, like Umm Saahila says. Did your dad bring up the child bearing stuff or did you? Cuz that sure is funny. ;)